✨The Missing Piece ✨
By 💸Sara Vasa💸
Some of my happiest memories are from my childhood when my grandmother used to visit us. I remember the anticipation butterflies in my stomach every time we went to the airport to pick her up.
I come from a culturally diverse family. My parents come from two different continents,
Asia and Europe. Both cultures are very different and rich in traditions. My dad comes from India, where food is a big deal. People love to get together to cook, especially for various festivals and holidays. India in itself is so diverse. It’s believed there are over 122 languages spoken in the country. We have a lot of Indian friends, and are fortunate to attend many Indian gatherings and parties. The food is also very diverse, because every region and area in India has their own food, tradition and language, there are even differences in how people dress from one region to another. Though I don’t eat most of the food because it’s spicy, I do sometimes try things that are not very spicy.
My mom’s family comes from a beautiful small country called Moldova. The culture is rich in traditions. Moldovan people are known for their kindness, but also for amazing handy work. Like embroidery, handwoven carpets, and many other things. Moldova is also known for some of the best wines in the world. Moldovan people also love food, and since Moldova has a lot of rural land, a lot of people live off of their land, and they preserve their food for the winter. Moldova is a religious country, and some of the biggest holidays they celebrate are Easter and Christmas. Cooking together with families days before the holidays is one of the biggest traditions. Children, parents and grandparents usually gather at the grandparents’ home and cook together, while spending quality time with family. The day after Easter everyone goes and visits their loved ones at the cemetery, and leaves treats on the graves of loved ones, something similar to the day of the dead in latin culture.
Most of our relatives on both sides of the family still live overseas. Because of that,we don’t get to see them as often as we would like or participate in many family events.
Since I was born, my grandma from my mom's side would come almost every year and stay with us for about 6 months. Those were very special and fun times. When I was young, she enjoyed walking me in the stroller and talking to me in her language. She showered me with so much love. When I was a bit older, she would teach me to cook and bake various dishes, pastries, cookies and so many other delicious things. One time for Christmas my grandma wanted to teach me how to cook a very delicious dish that my mom still to this day cooks for Thanksgiving and Chirtmas. It's a bell pepper stuffed with fried rice and beef, my mom would boil the bell pepper in water then stuff it. You would have sour cream on the side, it was so incredibly good. I miss my grandma very much. That time spent with her will always be my treasured memories.
Three years ago, in 2019, my grandmother passed away from metastatic breast cancer. She was still very young, just 63 years old. When she passed away, I felt very sad and I miss her very much.
Because I grew up in the US and haven’t had the opportunity to visit any of my parents' home countries, I sometimes feel a bit lost. I can't say I am Indian or Moldovan. I know I am American, but that is not a culture. I don’t know what culture to identify with.
I feel like when I lost my grandmother, I lost that link to her culture, to all the things she still had to teach me and I had to learn. I know my mom is there, but it’s different when it comes from grandmother. Her love, her kindness and wisdom are irreplaceable in my view. Losing her, I feel like I lost a little piece of myself and my identity.
I can’t wait to travel to both countries and discover the cultures for myself. It’s hard building your identity when you don’t really know what you are and where you come from. But I think it’s very critical for our growth as humans and development of identity to keep these cultural links if not with family, maybe with friends or community. Knowing and understanding our roots will help us humans build and develop a sense of our identity and cultural belonging. And even though I lost my grandmother I still hope to find other ways to not lose touch with both cultures but especially my grandmother’s culture.
